Monday, December 12, 2005

My Bank and Good Nutrition

My Conversation with the Bank Teller today:

Teller: Why don't you have a savings account with us?
Me: Because you charge for it.
Teller: No we don't.
Me: Without a minimum balance of X dollars you do.
Teller: No, we don't.
Me: Really??
Teller{smugly}: Really. You just need to put at least $25 from your checking into your savings every month.

I didn't continue at this point, but that sounds a lot like a minimum balance to me. Also, she was nice, but did she need to get all touche on me? I loved the second "No, we don't" aka "I've won the argument you fool even though we do require a minimum balance we just restructured the deal to confuse your moronic mind."

Another reason I don't have a savings account with my bank is that I use every available penny I slave for to pay down debt with carries an interest rate of at least 10%. The gracious savings rate at my bank.....0.5%. Stunning, isn't it?

Hey, Mrs. Bank, I'll give you $1,000 to loan out to people at variable rates and you can pay me $5. Yippeeeee!!!! What does $5 even buy these days? My trip to Baja Fresh the other day put me back $6, and I didn't even get a drink. Just a burrito. $6. So I guess I'd have to let my bank borrow more than $1,000 for a year to get a free burrito from Baja Fresh. No drink though, better bring a can of soda with me.

So we all know that I'm not an economist, but let me tell you what I think is happening. The banks are getting really, really, really rich and the American people are getting really, really, really poor. We just don't know it yet. Everyone cashing in the equity on their homes to buy crap and artificially inflate the GDP seem to think this is free money. That's supposed to be your savings vehicle, not the 0.5% savings rate. How did this rate get so low? Seriously, if it's all relative, then how much lower can it go? Well, only about a fraction less that 0.5% I think, or the bank conversation might sound like this:

Teller: I noticed you don't have a savings account with us?
Me: You don't actually pay any interest so there is no incentive for me.
Teller: Well, sir, technically you might be correct, but you still don't have a savings account with us. So there!

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