Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Who Wants Some?

One of the more interesting, unique, loving, bewildering banshees I've ever had the pleasure of meeting, and sharing a living room with for 9 months.

SP - you're one of the best.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


Ahmandinejad, kind of a buzz kill, don't you think? The guy has to be smart, right? He's the leader of an entire nation. I'm not claiming he'll do well in Trivial Pursuit or can survive in the wilderness without provisions, but he just has to be at the very least a "B" student. Can we agree on this? Even if we can't, just for argument sake, can you give me this one?

And then we get this: Ahmadinejad announced the conference would set up a "fact-finding commission" to determine whether the Holocaust happened or not. The commission will "help end a 60-year-old dispute," he said.

So, given this type of statement, we don't have too many options.

a.) He believes this to be true.
b.) He does not believe this to be true, but is using this to further his international/political drama.

Can there be other options? If so, please comment

Until then:

If a.) Wow. I'm stunned that you're this dumb;
If b.) Then, well, Fuck you.

Additionally, how do you solve this mystery? How would one, or say everyone go about uncovering the chilling truth to this 60+ year old caper? Now I'm starting to get excited. It's like when I used to watch an hour long episode of 'The A Team' only to be broadsided in my deepest moment of curiosity and pure enjoyment with "To Be Continued."

"To Be Continued!!!!!!!!!?" What the!!! mother f'n, sonofa, shiiiiiiiiiiiitttt!!!!," my eight year old throat would bellow. You can't just suck me in like this and then expect me to wait a whole week to finally be soothed back into normalcy with what portends to be yet another deliciously clever ending. I want gratification NOW!

Anyhow, deep breathes, breathe in, breathe out. I'm okay. But what is Iran really about? Why is this Israel/Palestine issue so important? Discover all you want, maybe only 1 Jew died from a staph infection and everybody conspired to brew this into the "Holocaust." Okay, what now?

Dear Israel,

We found out the truth. Please move.

Thank you,


How about this. Let's have some fun and assume the completely farcical, and totally impossible: the Israelis leave Israel. Huh? Pretty nice, eh Iran? So, for the second time in one post - what now? The Palestinians still can't feed themselves. And for that matter, get the world off their addiction to oil, and neither can you.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Tree Decorating

As generous as it may seem, lending a helping hand when needed is just my simple philosophy for L-I-V-I-N.